1. |
Pity Sex
03:12
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every time she smiles i collapse again
every time she laughs i can never win
but we're never alone together
we’re never alone at all
i never knew how to be myself
i never knew what to expect
when i changed it all for good
mass reward
for mass regret
let them have their ignorance
mass reward
for mass regret
let them be
let them be
i swore i'd never do that again
the last time i did i lost a friend
the strength to carry on
the strength that broke my back
last time i never let her in
last time i always let him win
then it hit me
the problem is you
mass reward
for mass regret
let them have their ignorance
mass reward
for mass regret
let them be
let them be
and that's what she said
and that's what he said
and that's what they all say but they all say what we want to hear
mass reward
for mass regret
let them have their ignorance
mass reward
for mass regret
let them be
let them be
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2. |
Long Shawn Silvers
03:02
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i know i fucked up
i’m so sorry for being loud
and for everything i did when i was around
but it’s so hard
to be your honest self
and not apologize for being anything else
and i still miss you when you’re not here
but you’re also kinda my biggest fear
saying, doing anything, my head taking control of me
and thinking that i’m honestly the worst at human decency
i wanna be forgotten all the time
i just want you to act like i’m not committing some heinous crime
i wanna be forgiven most of the time
but i don’t deserve it most of the time
i don’t deserve it
all of the love i get
because i don’t know when not to scratch an itch
but if you love me
say it to me now
because i need to be reminded i’m worth something somehow
you can’t tell me that i’m okay
then rip my heart away cause i can’t
stand not doing anything but thinking that i’m so controlling
forcing all my friends to give me anything worth holding but
i wanna be forgotten all the time
i just want you to act like i’m not committing some heinous crime
i wanna be forgiven most of the time
but i don’t deserve it most of the time
and i wanna be remembered after i’m dead
i just wanna be someone who isn’t thought of as a girl who shot herself in the head
i wanna live my life with no regrets
but i haven’t lived my fullest life yet
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3. |
Hardly Any, If At All
02:37
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can you help me?
i can barely look at myself
do you hate me?
i’m just trying to be honest
with you
i know that you want me to
so here it goes
i hate seeing all of you grow
and whenever i have something to say you’ve gotta say it louder
you take all of my problems away because you’re all of them wrapped into one
but today’s the day i’ve decided i won’t even watch you
become better people because you’re all just the best
or so you think
i don’t blame you
if you think i’m an asshole to everyone around me
but watch your back. one day you might just find yourself needing me
i don’t have much to offer since you’ve already taken it
and packaged it up for a mass produced audience
that’s kinda shitty
i thought you were better than that
and whenever i have something to say you’ve gotta say it louder
you take all of my problems away because you’re all of them wrapped into one
but today’s the day i’ve decided i won’t even watch you
become better people because you’re all just the best
or so you think
i can’t even stand being in the same room with you
i’d rather just fuck with my phone or stare at my shoes
if i take up too much space well that’s just too bad
i might as well have never come here at all
or so i think
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4. |
Is This Loss?
03:09
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when i’m alone (again) i can feel you crawling up my skin
this empty feeling won’t go away no matter how many dabs i rip
i’m already everything i’m not
i’m already everything i don’t wanna be
and suddenly i realize what’s behind me is in front of me
dealing with my problems just ain't as easy as it used to be
i’ll lie to your face about what’s going on inside of me
so if you trust me that’s your own fault, honestly
or maybe it’s mine
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5. |
This Isn't The End Of Us
01:57
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i’ve been away from the sunshine for far too long
locked up in my room, but i’m going long
you better catch me before i fall
staying up all night to talk to you
is getting to be much more of a pain than two
days of calling off work
but i’m trying
to be more honest with you
and everyone i talk to
but it’s so hard
to be who you want to be
when you can’t even stay out past 12:30
i’ve been struggling
being clear-cut again
and with anxiety setting in
i can’t handle it
everyone’s watching me
to find out who i’ll be
it’s none of your fucking business
i hope that you’ll stay far away from this
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6. |
||||
new shoes, new bands
what will i create with these hands today?
i’m alright, i’m alright
if i say it enough then i'll be good
i try
but i’m not the same
no i just can’t be
but i haven’t changed
it’s so frustrating
i started strong, broke out of my shell
but these new bands (newgrounds death rugby, b. fraser, broke boy, anergy) are the shit today, oh well
i stole your shirt to make you sad
i never thought it would make me feel this bad
but i’m not the same
no i just can’t be
but i haven’t changed
it’s so frustrating
i’m unprepared to talk you
but i’ll try my best to be as clear-cut and see-through
i’m serious with my questions from the back of the room
but i’m sure i won’t be called on, no i won’t be called on soon
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7. |
||||
i started waking up
on time, before nine
no breakfast, no nothing, waste time by the oven
and think about my life
my friends go through hard times but i’m lonely too
i’m sick always feeling like there’s nothing to do
but i’m settling everything
you wanna be alright?
then tell me the reason why
[you say] “but you’re up all night”
you’re right i can’t deny
i could be doing better
i don’t wanna hear that shit again
if you can be alright
then maybe there’s hope for me after all
you yell at me
“don’t live inside your head”
i raise my voice to you
because of the time you pushed me off the bed
i’m so scared of fucking up, i’m scared what you’ll do
but living like this is having nothing to prove
i’ve gotta get back to living my life
you’ve got to leave me to die
you wanna be alright?
then tell me the reason why
[you say] “but you’re up all night”
you’re right i can’t deny
i could be doing better
i don’t wanna hear that shit again
if you can be alright
then maybe there’s hope for me after all
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8. |
Hickory Lame
01:21
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why can't i decide for myself what i want life to be about?
and as i'm changing lanes, headed towards my friend's house in Ladson
i can't help but think "what if they have a change of heart so suddenly about me?"
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9. |
The Last Of Us, Pt. II
01:50
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i know my life can get kinda boring
playing the last of us till 1 in the morning but
i can’t help myself, i mean it literally
and acting like i’m worthless when everyone needs me
but it’s okay to feel, it’s okay to get fucked
when really all you need is for someone to tell you you’re loved
so i’ll stay inside all day, and go out at night
to surround myself with friends that’ll tell me i’ll be alright
i really wanna know what you’re feeling
so i can help you keep from sinking
you really wanna know what i’m feeling?
maybe you’ll understand how badly we are treated
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10. |
||||
i’m so glad you came out to see me play
but i’d rather you stay home and think of me in a better way
i’m trapped and lonely with nowhere to call home
can i make it on my own?
i hate myself and you hate me too
and i can’t help but think what you said is true
like “you’ll die alone” and “you don’t mean shit to me”
and you won’t care when i drive halfway across the country
and i still know what you did to me
but i’m an open book and i‘m not hard to read
why did you decide to attack?
i wanna see you alive when i get back
i’m sorry for texting my ex
i’m sorry for thinking that i can’t be the one to love you best
but what if we could be like them?
why do i keep playing pretend?
and i still know what you did to me
but i’m an open book and i‘m not hard to read
why did you decide to attack?
i wanna see you alive when i get back
and i still know what you said to me
about how you never even wanted to leave
when did you decide to attack?
i wanna see you alive when i get back
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Never Any Ordinary Charleston, South Carolina
ur least favorite emo band
Midnight Wolf Records gang
booking: neveranyordinary@gmail.com
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